creative
innovator
environmentalist
social activist
Sensory Pleasurist
A being whose finds immense pleasure in the observation and experientiality of all senses that are and yet to be defined...
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Who am I?
Up until this point in my life, I have attached my identity to whatever I am doing for work at a particular time in life. So first, I was an athlete, then a college student actress, followed by professional theatre actress, and then for the past 12 years, I have been a professional stunt woman.
Yet, until now, I still had no sense of identity outside of what I did-which is stifling. Something has been fighting inside of me because I tend to feel like I can not go outside of the box that each institution has me in. If I want to fit into these career lifestyles, I had to BE a certain way, so it seemed. I literally felt stifled by the clothes on my back. Hiding parts of my personality, censoring myself constantly in order to fit in and keep the peace. Both symbolically, and in reality I wanted to shed that mask I had been conditioned to wear, and get naked. To stop people pleasing, and expand into myself.
I have performed in over 50 movies and television shows, I have learned innumerable life skills as a high level athlete and performer, from the theatre and film industries, I have lived and breathed stunts for over an entire decade, But just like COVID put a halt to the movie industry for approx. 6 months, we in SAG-AFTRA are at another halt as we strike to negotiate better pay and contracts so we can continue to make a living in the new world of this greedy late stage capitalism, with streaming, tech, and AI. And just as the COVID shut down forced us to look inside of ourselves when our identity could no longer be attached to what we do for work, the same thing has happened now.
As soon as we went on strike, I bought a plane ticket to Europe, leased out my house and apartment in Atlanta, and flew to Greece.
I had this deep urge to stay in a stone house on the beach of the crystal clear sea, to convene with Poseidon- To face my fears of the unknown. And, that’s exactly what I did, plus so much more. I could, at last, at 35 years old, begin to heal and finally discover who I truly am. To live an authentic life, with my authentic self.
What did I learn and how am I implementing that Into my new life?
The portal to healing started to break open when I found the Island of Milos. Based on my needs of seclusion and the sea, Milos was a great place to begin to open my fiery locked up heart space. It's where I realized that my yearning for shedding these symbolic and ACTUAL clothes, existing in naturalism, wasn’t actually weird! It was normal here. Even the local Greek people go here for naturalism. It was sanctioned as a safe place to do this amongst other people like me. I traveled to Paros and Mykonos after that. In Mykonos, I found Elia Beach. It was a safe place to experience the world as I chose to experience it. No shame. By day, I swam like a mermaid in a naturalist environment, both symbolically and physically faced some deep fears, and by night, I experienced more expansion in clubs listening to DJs from all over the world. It's here where I realized that dancing was a way of regulating my emotions. I learned that I feel my best and most secure as an individual when I am exploring, traveling, experiencing spaces. The self- imposed solitude as a solo traveler amongst the crowds, breathing, and truly being present, I was allowing myself to feel this buzzing energy of people who are of the same mind that I am. My people, the travelers. I felt at home, welcomed, accepted for all that I am-not weird, or “inappropriate.” But if weird, the good weird. The best weird. And that incredibly necessary step that affirmed my existence is what brought me here-to this screen.
Im a fixer, a doer, a go getter, humbly yet confidently one of the hardest workers I know, so it takes great effort in my mind and body to be able to sit, relax, and be present without trying to fix something. However, As soon as I tap into that breath space of doing nothing and just be ‘me,’ I am approached by all kinds of people exclaiming how wonderful and intoxicating my energy is; Whether it’s on the dance floor, in a passing yet connecting conversation, a communicative transaction with hotel staff, restaurant servers and hosts, bartenders, bouncers, drivers, the grocery store attendant, gas station attendant, etc. etc. Part of experiencing these spaces is experiencing the energetic objects that are also a part of that space. This includes people, furniture, light, decor, cars, scooters, signage etc. Being sensitive to energy flow is key in intuitive design. It's an essential part of successful travel as a solo traveler. Find the flow by being the flow amongst the flow.
I am also atuned to the energy of crowds. I can feel when a mass of people are confused, aren’t understanding where to go, and most of us are atuned to this- when things are confusing and get congested-most people notice by examining their inner state. Traffic flow is essential in spaces where there are many people all at once. And something quite interesting happens in my mind when I allow myself to go through the steps to observe this: arriving, slowing down, breathing, observing, and seeing the full picture- I can immediately see in my minds-eye, the solution to the flow problem. Sometimes it's the lack of signage, or where the bar is located in regards to the entrance. Sometimes, just by moving a bed to make a space more inviting and open, putting up signage to help with the flow of people, designing landscape to allow for a more gentle pouring of people into the entrance of a club, setting up your desk to allow for the smoothest and least complicated process of work-all of these things make things FLOW . When I solve the chaos formula that people experience when moving about spaces, or rather, getting stuck in spaces, it solves the problems of the bottlenecking that happens in our souls, hearts, and spirits when we all feel trapped. It's a physical and tangible relaxation of internal and external energy flow.
This is called:
Economy of Motion
The principle that allows for energy in motion to continue in motion through the most direct manner possible, in order to reduce chaos or trauma.
By achieving economy of motion, we allow for more space and time to become experts in experience, thus becoming more present.
We are like an electrical current. Our natural tendency is to find the most direct path to complete the circuit.
We are also a living organism amongst other organisms, seeking out our likeness, attaching ourselves to them for pleasure, or fighting against them in order to find more pleasure.
All of this requires us to sit back and breathe first and foremost. Always, take the pause. Be less reactive. Listen to our gut, and confidently leap out of fear.
Observations & Hopes
During travel, I find that most energetic chaos and congestion happens in airports, hotels, businesses, clubs, as well as private homes, etc. And I feel this deep urge to help spaces for people who feel like something in their space is bottlenecking, doesnt feel right, is inefficient. It really takes an objective, outside eye and someone with the super power of being ultra sensitive to energy flow, who practices the ancient art of Feng Shui, to help with these problems. I love to help people organize in a way so they can stop trying to figure out how to fix something, and are able to just be, and just exist in the space, which leads to a feeling of internal contentment. And in my life time of experiences thus far, I find the most direct path to this is achieved by creating a space that allows for this opening.
If we open up our exterior spaces, we open up the interior of our hearts-this is a key element to ultimate happiness, breath, and compassion for the earth and all of its inhabitants.
Another hope of mines, is to encourage females to travel solo. To drop the crutch and safety of another person, to bravely go to these places that I have traveled to, which have opened up this interior space in my heart I never could have imagined was possible. I want to help other women find this too so they can feel confidence In learning how to experience new and unfamiliar spaces. The confidence that the exterior exploration creates as a solo traveler, gives us the courage to look at our internal spaces and really see what blockages we are creating, by holding and grasping onto these silly patriarchal ideals. Sure, some of these observations can be accomplished by za-zen meditation, and meditation is definitely an important part of this self-discovery. But, there is this entire Earth out there, and if you limit yourself to an empty room in only one corner of the world, are you truly able to create the resilience that is necessary when you eventually find these reactive blockages internally? This is why I believe solo-travel is essential for the evolution into having the ultimate human experience. And what better way to do that than on a beautiful clear beach, in an ancient land, full of art and culture that is thousands of years older than we can even grasp in America...Ladies, time to explore and get naked!
I would describe myself as an Expert Experiencer.
My background:
Film making, stunts, self-defense, acting, modeling, photography, creative design, self-help through Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, Buddhism, Tonglen and Zazen meditation, philosophy, and travel.
I am a person who can add great value to your inner spirit and outer world through travel, guidance, advising, conversing, designing, photographing, and generally- yet most importantly, totally vibing.
Because energy is everything.
Consciously Curated
The Adorno Beach Hotel&Suites located in the Ornos area of Mykonos, Greece is a boutique hotel combining boho chic myconian vibes with a personalized and curated luxury experience of relaxation just minutes away from Chora. They offer top of the line concierge services as a part of the experience. They also provide various options for dietary restrictions such as gluten free/celiac friendly, vegan, and vegetarian food options!
Thoughtful & Instinctive
Lobby
Beautiful, airy, comfortable greeting. This creates a space that allows for that pause upon the busy arrival, that encourages intentional breath and energy to move freely.
Gluten Free Spread
Celiac friendly biscuits bread, and cookies. A breath of fresh air for those of us with dietary restrictions, allowing for respite and a sense of belonging.
Hydration
A personalized note upon arrival and eco-friendly hydration. This seemingly small free gesture from the property is hugely appreciated after a long, hot morning of travels.
Boheme Beach House
The Boheme Beach Houses overlook
Elia Beach in Mykonos, Cyclades, Greece. Elia Beach is one of the largest beaches in Mykonos. This was my favorite area to stay in the Cyclades because of its proximity to the immersive naturalist bathing portion of Elia Beach. The water is crystal clear, temperate, deep enough to make you feel like a true mermaid as you swim about the sparkling sea. The Boheme Beach Houses offer a perfect respite after a full day at the nude beach. The staff at Boheme Beach Houses will clean your rooms daily, refill the Nespresso coffee pods, and help out with any concierge service needs you may have. Don’t forget your nudist beach essentials: sunscreen for your bum (and your lips), a travel beach towel, snacks, and a beach umbrella!
Mileo Luxury Boutique Hotel Mykonos
My stay at Mileo Boutique Hotel in Mykonos was truly the most beautiful place I stayed while traveling Greece this past summer. I booked my stay on Booking.com pretty last minute (because this is how I roll). Tucked away in the lush hills above Kalo Lavadi beach, and arriving with my big hiking backpack tucked down by my feet on my scooter, I was graciously granted an early check in. Thank goodness too, because I had only gotten 3 hours of sleep the night before. It was a Scorpios and Void party night, so I was dragging pretty hard. They offered me a cup of coffee at the restaurant/ bar while they finalized some room setup. I sipped my coffee looking over the beautiful grounds. And then, shortly after I finished sipping, my room was ready. As soon as I opened the door to my suite, I knew this was going to be my favorite stay yet.
Mileo Luxury Boutique Hotel Mykonos
By merging clothing choices with nature, a deep sense of connection is formed with the landscape. The heartbeat of the rocky ground is strong in Mykonos and feeling it under your feet is an important part of this human experience .
The offering of barefoot chic vibes as you partake in your morning coffee ritual and overlook Kalo Lavadi beach.
The gusts of the Cycladic winds invite you to dance with the lush backdrop of lavender, wild grasses, and salty Cyprus trees.
Symbiosis with Nature
Traditional Myconian aesthetic is perfectly executed throughout the property at Mileo Luxury Boutique Hotel. This type of minimalist design that is found all around the Greek islands, represents a classic yet transformative ideal of integrating nature into design due to the lack of materials on the islands. This “biologically inspired design” makes me feel closer to the earth rather than separate. The closer I feel to the earth, the more I want to take care of her. If we can find ourselves again in this ancient, yet forgotten relation, we will be able to better heal as a species, and in turn, help heal the earth. Greece exudes a natural symbiosis between human and elemental earth, which is why I hold Greece so closely to my heart.
Intuitive Transportation
As a solo traveler in Europe who wants their own mode of transportation, it is necessary to have your International Drivers Permit as an American. Having your own mode of transportation allows you to follow your inner and intuitive time frame. It furthers your sense of autonomy and independence while simultaneously boosting your confidence and awareness. These permits are very easy to get! Go visit your local AAA office before you leave for your trip, and tell them you would like your IDP. They take your photo there at the office and stamp your booklet. All for just $20. If you want even more independence while traveling, go get your Motorcycle license before you get your IDP. You can take a 3 day Motorcycle safety foundation class where you learn to ride and get your license at the end. This will allow you to get a Motorcycle driving permit stamp on your IDP so you can rent scooters or motorcycles anywhere while traveling! Women, there will be men at the scooter rental places who give you a hard time when you ask them for a scooter over 50cc. BUT, when you tell them you have a motorcycles license, they will let you rent a 125CC scooter, which is much better for getting around the islands. My only warning, BE CAREFUL, always wear a helmet, and go slooowww! The high winds, the sand on the roads, and the condition of the tires will determine if you go down on the pavement or not. Not your skill on a scooter.
anadyomène
Naturalism:Feminism
Milos, Cyclades, Greece
Milos is a short and beautiful plane ride from the Athens airport. Milos is the southernmost islands of the Cyclades islands group. Milos is such a magical place, and I couldnt have chosen better accomidations than in the village of Klima. Klima is located on the northern coast of Milos. It's a small fishermans village lined with colorful boat houses called ‘syrmata.’ What's better, these houses also have the most picturesque small, colorful wooden boats that belong to each of the village boat houses. I stayed in one of these village homes called Magic Klima that I booked through AirBNB. In order to get there, you have to have your own transportation, beause public transport doesnt come to the village. So I rented a scooter, through my backpack on my back, and made my way to the magical village.
Introspection in Seclusion
When I am traveling alone I like to find balance between the busy cities and secluded islands. My heart and soul feel most fulfilled when I am able to find a place like Klima. Where I have to take off shoes in order to get to the syrmata house because the tide is in. Where the water laps around my feet as soon as I step out of the front door. Where I can hear the waves in my sleep and feel the energy of the water from my bed. It is in these environments where I can find myself again. So I always follow my gut when it's telling me to go find a stone house on the water. And no matter the distance traveled, or the time it takes to get there, I know I will feel better as soon as I arrive. I quickly found out that the water in Greece is a magical healing space.
Tsigrado Beach
A place for naturalism amongst the Gods. I sought out this specific beach because of its privacy from tourism. My goal: to finally get naked in the water. Body autonomy in the United States is hard to come by these days. One of the biggest reasons I came to Greece was to bathe nude in the crystal clear sea. The other places I ventured to in Milos had many tourists, and of them, Americans. The patriarchal shame I was feeling finally disappeared as soon as I stepped foot on Tsigrado Beach. It's a steep trek down from the parking area. First some steps, then a rope over crumbly ground, and lastly a wooden ladder that descends straight into the sea. The water was rough that day, and the beach was quite rocky and turbulent. There was one other person down there, a young man. I finally felt comfortable enough to disrobe, and feel the freedom of naturalism. I finally felt a small weight lift from my heart. It was at this moment, I knew I needed to go find my place to fully cleanse my soul here in the cyclades islands.
merideth.jessica@gmail.com
Living Principles
“Descartes concludes that there are an indefinite, or infinite, number of particles in the world. For any motion to take place, it is necessary that all imaginable particles shift their positions to some extent.”
Tap into your senses and discover your 6th sense.
Healing isn't linear: and there can still be economy of motion in the non-linear.
Solo travel is a necessary part of the evolution of the human experience.
Trust your Intuition.
Dancing to electronic music is an amazing way to regulate your emotions and connect with others who also want to vibe in a healing way.
Go to a space with the intention to experience the space.
Momentum is everything
Astakas Restaurant
Klima, Milos, Cyclades, Greece
Today I want to talk about shame and how it correlates to ocean waves. Shame is not something we are born with. In the argument of Nature Vs. Nurture, when it comes to certain aspects of our personality, shame is something we are taught (Nurture). Usually, this comes from friends or parents, society in general, and usually when we are very young. This past summer, shame was the big emotion that I sought to examine in myself. Something I realized upon reflection, was that this shame was the ugly mask thing that was covering up and its what was preventing the expression of my authentic self. And through years of dialectical behavioral therapy, I started coming to realize the root of that shame. The mother wound. I have very strong memories of being a young kid and wanting to dress how I wanted to dress, but received judgement from my mother, often being called a hussy for wanting to wear short dresses, belly shirts, tube tops. So as a young kid, I had this feeling of wanting to express myself through my clothes, but for reasons that really had nothing to do with me, my mother was projecting her own discomfort and judgement of her own body, her fears that were formulated based on her life, and projecting those onto me. So based on her experiences, and what society was telling her at the time, she was suppressing me. This was a huge contention point between she and I. We were in constant conflict, because I felt like I couldn’t just be me. I even used to say I wanted to be a stripper growing up. I liked being naked! I liked being proud of my body and performing.
But the constant hounding I received from family and society told me, “If you do this, you will not amount to anything in life, you will be scum of the earth, you will be selling your body, it’s prostitution, not a career, only women who are damaged do this, thus you MUST be damaged if you have these ideas and desires in your mind. You must be ‘over-sexualized’ which means you are mentally ill. This is a mental illness. Here, take this extremely dangerous medication, it will stop you from having these thoughts so you can be a normal person……”
ITS UTTER BULLSHIT. I knew this was bullshit as a young kid. It felt wrong for them to say that, and it has become incredibly clear in my adulthood that this is literally a patriarchal, made up, oppressive conservative christian mindset, created by colonizing white men to suppress women. And it was ingrained into me as a CHILD. I was angry about it then- I was such an angry child. I was mad at my mom constantly and mad at the world.
Side note: My mother was my primary caretaker from 9th grade onward because my father passed away.
Fast forward to college-where in the theatre, nudity is a technique that is used by playwrights, directors, actors, to illicit emotions in the audience. Because obviously we all have feelings and observations when we see someone else naked- especially a stranger because It holds up a mirror to our own perceptions. Of course, I always supported and partook in this technique because it was a very important part of the conflict I was feeling internally. A way to workout what was going on inside my head and body.
But wait guys, in theatre, people are going to see a show for entertainment, for catharsis, etc. and pay money, which go to the actors who are sometimes naked on stage. By the theory that society has taught us, and we all know how theatre has been oppressed by the conservative christians, this act would be prostitution! Again, that’s utter bullshit.
I have a fiery drive inside of me to squash the oppressors actions and words. To shut it down. I have had this feeling from a very young age. A strong sense of justice. I have always known that it was cruel to tell someone that their body is to be covered, and if its not, you should feel shame. Its cruel and its wrong. Dude, we all have fucking bodies. Babies have bodies, teenagers have bodies, old people have bodies, we all have them! Why is it okay for a baby to run around naked, and not an old woman? Why is that considered dangerous or indecent? Men who prey on women and children aren’t going to just come out of the woodwork because there are more areolas exposed at the beach. Sure, more people may look at those areolas. But so what. When they look down at their own body, they see the same thing. An areola. Because we all have them! Why is it dangerous to gaze upon someone else’s? Especially if they don’t give a fuck that you do? Why are you scared of being seen? Why is that scary to you? I believe that most of you, if you dug deep enough, would find that it was someone else who planted that fear in your mind. That shame of being seen rather than being taught that bodies are bodies, that we all have areolas, and they are, at their root, all the same, so theres no need to fear yours or other peoples.
It is my belief, that as a child, we should have been taught about decisions, not controlled (to cover up), or to control other people (their gaze). Not to mention, equality. We have the right to “free the nip”. This is where feminism and naturalism comes into play.
Other countries outside of America are privy to this theory. They recognize the absurdity and inequality a lot more than America does. I believe this has a lot to do with the ancient arts. The ancient cultures, in fact, the western world as we know it, began in the ‘fertile crescent’ (even the name has congruencies with bodily functions). These ancient cultures had artwork and worshiped gods often depicted nude. This spread throughout Europe. But halted when the puritans colonized the Americas. So those societies are surrounded with nude artwork, constantly exposed to and encouraged to gaze upon the beauty of that artwork. They realize that the art came from the minds of humans, often depicted in human form, which helps our human brains relate to that art. Ever heard of the Venus de Milo? This is a piece of artwork that is said to be of Venus (Aphrodite in Greek) , The goddess of love. Her proportions are in the perfect golden ratio- written mathematically as Phi. Her Greek origin story says that she was born out of the sea foam that was created from the severed genitals of Uranus. The perfect woman, depicted topless, born from severed genitals of the God of Heaven. I love it! What’s even more exciting to me, is that this statue was found (in modern times) on the island of Milos! The random Greek island I chose to go to because it felt like its where I needed to be. It was also on Milos, that I realized I have the Golden spiral (spiral of Phi) tattooed right next to my side boob. And I realized that as I was sitting on Tsigrado Beach, naked, for the first time in the sea, photographing myself. Talk about synchronicities!
It was at this moment that all things came to light in my mind about the shame I had felt my entire life. It is then that I realized that my body was perfect, and it was meant to be seen. Its where I realized that everyone’s body is perfect, and it is meant to be worshipped. Our bodies are beautiful. And most beautiful without masking them. A weight was lifted out of my heart. I felt a buzz of energy in what felt like every single cell of my body.
Side note: a couple months earlier I had accidentally (haha woops) done a hero’s dose of mushrooms and experienced what some people call ego death. I was a sponge, walking through a sponge. There was no separation between the outside world and what I consider “me” and my physical body. There was no more body, there was only sponge. And time didn’t matter. I was walking towards a place, reliving the walk over and over. I even said outloud, “we just did this” …..“we keep doing this”. More on this later.
So I had this seed in my mind that already told me there was no separation between all of “us” and the earth, the universe. And my shame dissipated. I looked at it, saw it, felt it, and took it off. I shed my clothes, and shed my shame. From this moment on, I was in complete alignment with what I would consider the infinite energy source. It was clear to me that this shame was like an ocean wave. If you turn your back to it, it is going to keep hitting you, over and over in the back of your head, its going to rip you underneath of it. But if you just turn around, stare straight at it, you can see it coming. You can jump over it if you need to. You can control your reaction to it. The next step is to immerse yourself into the waves. And hmmm, how interesting, when you get your shoulders under it, its almost like you can barely feel it. You are just kind of like, riding it. Riding the wave. Its more bearable. By starring at the shame, and making the decision to immerse yourself in it to explore it, the whiplash naturally dissipates. You know that waves aren’t going to go away. You can still see the shore. If anything is constant on this earth, it’s the waves, which is created by the tides. As long as we have a moon, we are going to have the tides. As long as we are human, we are going to have these things in our minds that were placed there. So even though they have invaded our authentic self up until this point, we can take it off as soon as it becomes too heavy. We immerse ourselves in the gentle undulation. The gentle undulation of waves reminds me of breath. And its funny how you don’t get that sensation when you have a bathing suit on. You can really feel it though when you are nude. It’s a powerful force that surrounds your entire body, but you can stay afloat and feel it at the same time.
So bringing it full circle: Your shame about your body was a seed that was placed long ago. Its not your fault. Its not worth blaming others, because it wasn’t their fault either. If we can blame anyone, perhaps it’s monotheistic, conservative christian men. But its not worth our energy to place blame. Its worth our energy to do our part in human evolution, and look at that shame, feel it, and then take the shame off and go get naked in the Aegean Sea at Elia Beach, Mykonos, Greece. Ha! But for real.
And if you can’t get to Greece right now, take yourself through that visualization of the waves, first in 3rd person. Where you can see your body in a birds eye view, watching yourself immersing into the sea. Then in first person, by putting your own eyeballs back on, and feel the undulation. Then take yourself out of the picture completely, as if you’re only breath. And as your physical body breathes in, all you see is a gentle, temperate, cooling undulation that fills the fiery space that begins in your vagina (or perineum if you’re a dude), and travels through the center of your body all the way to the space just above the top of your head. Gently coming in all the way to the top, and cooling the red space, turning it blue, then eventually a shiny sparkly white. And when you’ve turned your inner channel white, stop spending money on frivolous bullshit, stop having kids, and go travel so you can feel this in real life and heal this generational trauma.
